I’m conducting a social experiment. I have a hypothesis about Craigslist. While a veritable gutter of thievery and whores, it’s also a giant flea market for kink. If you know how to use the system it can work for you. In my experience if you want something that specific, the fastest way to success is being direct with an many people as possible. Cuts down on the bullshit. I just posted an ad to Craigslist titled Knows What She Wants.
It goes:
“I want someone to suck on my right nipple and then finger me until I squirt.
Send me a picture and what you want. We can negotiate from there.”
I included a headless shot of myself in just undies.
After going live I immediately masturbated and took a nap. Going into this project horny is like grocery shopping while hungry – I’m more likely pick up something I don’t want. After getting my beauty sleep I found a little over 20 messages in my inbox. I’ve suspended the ad indefinitely, subject to further investigation.
The first 5 responses were just a question, “Real?” Apparently my picture is unbelievable. Or, more likely, these people troll the casual encounters feed trying to weed through the bots and prostitutes in hope of finding a real hookup. Don’t smirk. I’m almost certain their diligence pays off in the long run. It’s just like looking at porn but with the vague hope of a human connection. The only problem with this strategy is the obvious one. Most real women won’t respond to the question. Especially not the ones these men get excited about.
Only 9 of the remaining candidates were able to follow my simple instructions. I included a picture in my ad with specific instructions to send a picture in return. I also requested an indication of what they want. Using such a broad medium, reading comprehension is vital for screening. If you want a response from me you need to start with a good impression. 5 of the eligible volunteers earned the chance to move on to round 2. I sent them each the same response, “Are you single?”
The answer to this question is only important to me because of insurance purposes. I’m aware they can lie but I like to at least ask. It’s a guard against some poor guy that’s nervous about cheating. If he’s going to stray while straddling the fence on his feelings about it I might as well ask for drama. I got 3 responses from this blunt inquiry. All single, so they say. Two decided to follow up with conversation starters. The silent two have until 10pm to respond. As it stands, “Jake” is in the lead.
In the end, will I actually meet this person? I’m not sure. If anyone is equipped to hook up with a stranger on Craigslist, it’s me. This experiment is meant to explore my dominant side. I want an encounter where I get exactly what I want without the bullshit parts. I’m not heartless, so I’m even willing to negotiate for other activities. The important part is that it’s on my terms. I get to choose what we do and say no without any debates. That’s what I really want. The squirting is just icing on the cake.