Ugh, I feel ugly today.
Why do you say that?
I need a haircut, there’s a zit the size of Mount Rainier on my chin and all of my jeans are too tight so clearly I’m fat. I’m surprised your face hasn’t melted off just looking at me.
Your hair is fine, acne is temporary and you are a size 8 – that’s not fat.
But I FEEL fat.
Then stop it.
*rolls eyes* It’s that easy?Not any harder than going for a walk.
That’s not going to fix anything.
Have you tried it?
*sigh* No. I get sore whenever I go walking.
That’s what it feels like to get stronger.
It hurts?
Essentially. Challenges make us stronger so if it’s easy you probably aren’t making any progress.
But it’s easier.
Yes. And fruitless.
I don’t care about the fruit. I just don’t want to feel bad about myself anymore.
Let’s start by walking.
Fine.
As for the zit, that’s why we have concealer.
I know.
So why don’t you use it?
Because makeup is the most successful gender discriminating ploy designed by the patriarchy to oppress women. I refuse to be a pawn in their mind games.
Oooookay. But it does make you prettier.
It’s also too expensive.
Can’t argue with that. Like I said, the zit is temporary. Just forget about it.
Fine but that still leaves this mess of hair on top of my head.
Don’t worry, that’s taken care of.
Oh?
We’re walking to the salon.
You’re a genius.
I know.