Category Archives: Random

Past Highland

Art, Daily Life, Quick Thoughts, Random

Time spent driving east is when I prepare for the stares. Part of my battle with anxiety, a BIG part, is constantly remembering that no one gives a shit about me. Left unchecked self-absorption engulfs my consciousness. Like a teacup poodle, my ego sits trembling on a satin pillow. Perpetually expecting the judgement it was created to receive.  99% of the time, it’s true for everyone.  No one is thinking about you – they are too wrapped up in themselves.

I’m not truly that odd-looking, until I visit certain places from my past life. Then I get the looks. I consistently spend time in places where I don’t get looked at so now I can tell when people are really staring. Out here on the edge of East Memphis, there are people that openly stare. And then, inevitably, one old man HAS to comment on my tattoos. It’s cultural, generational, racial, and gender-derived patronizing at its worst. The same person is not compelled to ask a biker dude with a snake tattoo about whether “that hurt”.

I am crazy, but not about this.

Nothing to Say Here

Art, Daily Life, Games, Quick Thoughts, Random

Awake.

Vast expanse of page, time.

Fun had before.
Fun yet to come.

Not much to say about it.

I did install X-COM, however.

See ya on the flip side.

Pandora

Daily Life, First Impressions, mur, Quick Thoughts, Random

I didn’t use Pandora until 2015. Just another casualty of my Luddite lifestyle. I probably would have enjoyed it the free days. Playing games with playlists just to see what effect they have on each other. My music taste is broad, but in my head it all fits together. Pandora’s algorithm only plays with the safe associations between artists and genres. I glom onto the sound of the music. After that it just comes down to performance quality.

A band that can’t play live loses my interest quickly. Musical talent is tactile to a point. I can feel it when I dance. I want to feel it when they play. I want to reach through the music and run my hands along the fingers creating that sound. I want to dance and sweat and feel the heat of passion when the music plays. Every sweaty hug I get after a good show just adds to the experience. I crave that tangible connection to the sound itself.

Of course, my thoughts and feelings are irrelevant until I’ve secured rights to my own vlog. So there’s always that.

Rote

Art, Daily Life, Games, mur, Quick Thoughts, Random, Reasons for Things, Stories

My generation is behaviorally trained to remember things accurately. We believe what we see. Whether it’s numbers, facts, words, formulas, compositions, or every Kevin Bacon movie ever made – we recite, we feel accomplished.  I personally think this goes back to scantron-era testing.  But I’m an outlier, so my perspective is akimbo.  Continue reading Rote →

Team Charlie

Art, mur, Quick Thoughts, Random, Reasons for Things

I lent a
specially
pre-ordered
personally signed
1st edition
American Gods
To my BEST FRIEND
LindsAy
Right after I finished reading it
In 2001

Once
I asked for it back
Seeing it displayed
No dust cover
on a manicured shelf
at her  party
celebrating
a new bungalow
his commitment
And always having money.

Stone-faced
Insisting
THAT one
is HER copy

Lying bitch.

That’s my memory
held hostage by
her insanity.

I still have the jacket.
I love that book.
Someone should know.

Fanfair

Art, Daily Life, First Impressions, mur, Murphy's, Places, Random

I’ve listened to ska before.  This week I heard it for the first time.  The Toasters played Murphy’s and I was there.  Started in 1981, the NYC band’s existed longer than most of my friends.  According to Tyler, they chose Memphis to start off their first tour in 6 years.  I don’t feel the need to fact check him.  Ska is one of those music genres I lump in a pile labeled “rock”.  It’s my catch-all term for music I’ve never really heard.  As a teen, I thought ska was a type of skateboarding event.  No joke. Continue reading Fanfair →

A Hard Bargain

Art, P & H Cafe, Quick Thoughts, Random

Things
Fighting
To be there.

The warmth of the sun
Shared by all
Peer pressure
to enjoy it.

I can hear all the music.
It makes me smile.
Things I get
out of my head
The work I do
to keep them in.
Faultless.
Grand.

Working through it.
Walking through it.
Wading through it.
Swimming… tonight?

Barefoot

Art, Buccaneer, Daily Life, DKDC, Ernestine & Hazel's, First Impressions, Java Cabana, Large Events, mur, P & H Cafe, Places, Random

I’ve been stuck on this moment from last week. Dave Cousar jammin’ with John Paul Keith at the Buccaneer.  I think I heard JPK at DKDC last season.  I really heard him last week.  The vibe there was palpable.  A room of talent pulsating with the passion of creation and all you have is my word for it.  WIN_20150715_003357 (3)

 

A Limerick

Art, Random

I once met a pretty boy named Ted
So charming I promptly lost my head
Incredibly dreamy
My pants got all creamy
Went crazy and fell off of my meds.