Upon empirical first glance, my generation cares more about Facebook than they should.  Not news, except for the fact most people still deny their level of actual investment.  An adequate metaphor for any of the online fads that permeate every facet of our culture, Facebook represents a desire for connection to something greater than our daily lives.  Suppose that’s something to expect from the amount of media programming we received during formative years. That’s when communications with the machines really started, if you see where I’m coming from. Empathy in binary. 

Even at my extreme level of detachment, I’ve hurt feelings with an infamous de-friending.  I was simultaneously flattered by the level of interest and slightly disgusted at the thought.  I’ve also tasted the gratification of rejecting friend requests but the thrill is overrated.  Taking Facebook friendship literally is inherently narcissistic.  Whether you can see certain posts or someone publicly acknowledges your association, it’s based on insecurity and co-dependence.  The perfect boyfriend-tracking tool.  Ideal parental monitoring.  Consistent anonymous validation.  The best thing in an emotional crisis because Facebook is always there to make you feel less alone in your isolated existence.

I didn’t join Facebook until I decided to leave home.  Even then, I didn’t really use it until I got here.  I find the idea of letting people know I care about them comforting.  I think about people from my past way more often than I ever get to tell them about it.  Even with the tiny world a la internet, I am influenced and affected every day by dozens of people in my life.  From my friend Beth that helped me embrace my freedom as a single woman to a guy named Tyler that reminds me not to sweat the small stuff.  I get to leave notes for my ex-husband every few months when there’s that one thing only he and I will understand.  (Like a dog with uncanny similarity to my Bette.)

I blog about my feelings and events assuming no one will ever see it.  Safe assumption, for the most part.  If I put something on Facebook it’s because I deliberately want it seen.  That’s the social contract.  I’m saying things in public and that’s why it has any weight.  Frankly, I don’t care about weight.  I say what I want because speech is free and I think before speaking, usually.  The people I’m talking to might not care but my only goal is to communicate my thoughts.  Reception is out of my hands at this point.  In some ways, the blog represents warning shots.  Those that take heed are awarded my consideration.

But don’t get me wrong.  I’m still going to say what I want.